Posts filed under ‘Observations of Insanity’
Girl With Glasses
There is a book with the same title actually.
That book somewhat summed me up, too. A GWG is what I am and what I always will be.
I have an insatiable urge to push them up sometimes, or even adjust them when I feel the situation needs it.
I’ve always known I was obsessed with glasses. Really. I’ve worn them for more than half my life. It’s only natural that I’m obsessed with it the way I am.
Of course, I probably shouldn’t squeak and cry out when they’re torn off my face. It’s just that…it’s like tearing off someone’s limbs. Dear reader, if you have ever torn the glasses off a girl with glasses, I pity you. I know what usually happens next. It’s quite violent actually. Bet you didn’t think girls with glasses could do that.
But we are rather good at surprising you. After all, we wear glasses. It’s not just to look smart you know. Though, apparently some people do that. I was a little shocked to hear it. I mean, if you have the natural ability to see, why wear them? Not that I would trade my glasses for sight. I think. I’m not sure I would want a life without them. Not contacts or that laser-eye thing. Even if I want better eyesight, I wouldn’t be able to part with these. Perhaps, I should just go with the surgery and continue to wear glasses, just not corrective lenses. It would be strange, but I’m not letting these specs go that easily.
Add comment February 2, 2008
Irrelevance
On a random note, I’m a lepidopterophobe.
There is a word for my phobia of butterflies. It’s rather reassuring that there are others who have my problem.
Of course, I do think I might have hypergraphia which is an insatiable urge to write randomly for no reason whatsoever.
Cacoethes scribendi, my typing fingers.
Oh and if you don’t know that latin phrase…go look it up.
At least, my oh-so-spiffy reader, I’m not writing this out to you. My handwriting is what my comrades term “chicken-scratch”. I am not a chicken, and therefore I do not really understand.
Some say, if you eat carrots you will have better eyesight.
IT IS A LIE!!!!!!!!
…Just putting it out there.
Add comment November 2, 2007
Lots o’ posts today!
Do you guys remember my neighbor’s completely-black cat that has creepy glowy green eyes in the dark? I keep running into it, nowadays. Poor thing. After what happened two months ago, no wonder it backs away whenever I come near it. I love kitties too.
Anywho, two months ago, a lovely summer morning, I’m look out my window to see Mr. Kitty (I don’t care if it’s female, Mr. Kitty sounds cute and that’s what I call every cat I don’t know) outside. He’s actually rather adorable in the morning, just not at night. So we have a type of showdown. You see, his eyes bore into mine, and I couldn’t help but look back (musta been a scorpio, –it reminded me of my great-grandad). Eventually it got scared and took off. Now I don’t see him outside my window anymore. It’s really sad. I kinda got used to it. I need someone to get a cat that likes to climb back up there again. I do run into Mr. Kitty sometimes, but it backs away like I’m gonna kill it. I wouldn’t hurt a kitty! Nuuuuuuuu~ I wuv kitties!
I think I terrified that one though. Which is actually a little amusing, since I run into it so much. I wonder how I should make friends with said Mr. Kitty.
I shall look on the internet to find the answer I seek! Yay procrastination from geometry. I’m sorry Euclid. I’m sorry Gods of Math.
Add comment October 13, 2007
The History of Athena-Language
No. Not the goddess’. Mine.
Indeed, lotsa people know about the way I speak as I have spoken to them oddly enough. But here is a rough guide to my language as people sometimes have a hard time understanding. Some people just think I add “ies” to everything I say. I do not. (more…)
Add comment July 3, 2007
Picture this
I’m in a dojo. Of martial arts.
I have to key-aye. Meaning I have to yell. I’ve taken a course called prepare at school in which I have to yell too. This makes the action stronger and more surprising and jazz.
I can’t. Prepare had a valid reason. “No” as it don’t try to touch me you weirdo assaulter.
I don’t like loud noises. I don’t like yelling. I’m a silent supporter.
So I tried.
Everyone else went “Agh!” “Hah!” and whatnot, basic aggressive grunts.
I went, “Nya!”
I swear to god the guy in front of me cracked up.
This is also what I do when playing tennis. Some tennis players “grunt their way through a match”.
“Unnrgh” “Grr.” “uhh.”
Pas moi.
What do I do? Ask my court buddies. During a game this is what you hear from my side of the court:
“Nya!” “Moo!” “Gah!” “Nuu!” “Eep!” “Meep!”
This is sooooooo embarrasing. And yet, I’m not going to try to stop. This is my thing. No one will stop me. Ever.
Add comment July 3, 2007
The View Outside My Window
The flowers are blooming in red flower-buds in the tree outside my window. I’m wonderfully happy that I can see this from my desk, but there are also certain other things I have seen that must be recorded.
I cannot make this up.
I’m doing my math homework and playing on the computer at the same time, a habit formed in my youth when I hear a dull “thwack” outside my window. Glancing up, I see nothing. As all humans, I too have been endowed with peripheral vision, albeit 40/50. And therefore I do remember seeing a gray blob whiz past my window while bumping against it. But because I’m busy not caring, I shrug and go back to “work”.
It happens again, and this time I hear a slight squeak accompanying the dull noise, and think I see a fluffy tail. At this point I’m intrigued. Maybe, I think, one of my strange friends has gotten it into his/her head to throw rocks against my window until it gets my attention/until it breaks. But looking out, no one is there. I sit down once more and give a good glance at my window when it happens a third time. I distinctly remember seeing a squirrel outside my window. Complete with bushy tail and panicky eyes, the squirrel, in fetal position (or I think it is a squirrelly version of it) bounces (thwack) against my window then off onto the ground. Giving a glance outside I see three squirrels twitching.
I’m slightly worried. If squirrels can get head trauma this explains why the ones outside my house act so nuts, if you will. But I wonder whether somehow they find pleasure in this—rather masochistic, if I do say so myself—act. Because it’s become rather frequent as of late.
I’m also afraid that a butterfly will come in so I’m forever on the lookout, though I let my guard down at night, which isn’t good. My neighbor’s completely-black cat, with it’s creepy-so-green-it-glows-in-the-dark eyes, decides to perch about and stare at me through my window at around that time just so I can get really terrified.
Add comment April 28, 2007
Spring is coming…
…and with the spring comes the one thing I truly fear more than all others.
All my life I’ve been terrified of butterflies. I have no particular reason why. I understand they cannot do a thing (I have read up on them you know…a butterfly has no way with which to harm other creatures…it drinks nectar for crying out loud) and yet I am still terrified.
I suppose it’s a phobia. In fact I’m sure it is one, merely because it is an irrational fear. I know it is nothing to fear, in fact it makes no sense to fear it since it is just a butterfly. But I also know for sure that if a butterfly fluttered towards me I will scream and hide behind the closest thing/human being no matter what/who it is. Yes, I also know I’m pathetic.
I don’t know how I survived the first two times I went into the Butterfly Observatory at the Museum of Natural History. But I do know this, the third time (last year) I could not get myself past the door of another observatory somewhere in Canada. I took one step and they were everywhere, I cowered in the corner until someone finally allowed me to leave through the wrong door. I cannot and I will not ever do that again. I might die of fright.
This may be a good time to list my fears*:
5. Not making it into college – I honestly am not sure I’m really afraid of that…
4. Flunking a class. (I’ve gotten to use flunking in a sentence!)
3. Roller coasters – How can something so rickety hold you?
2. Horror Movies
1. Butterflies
Note, dear reader, how my first and greatest fear is of butterflies. Butterflies terrify me. Just like pennies terrify Kohaku-chan. And therefore I do not entirely look forward to spring, I cannot, knowing what it entails for me. My destruction. Mommy! Don’t make me doooooooo this! I don’t waaaannnnaaa go outside when there are flowers out there! They’ll come and land on meeeeeeee!
This is my reaction…and it isn’t even spring yet. I will pray for a few more days of butterfly-less winter and steel myself for the horrors to come.
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*I have of course left out the typical fear of not doing my best or working hard enough and hurting others out of my list merely because that is a fear I suppose many might have and not strange enough to enter my list. Ah! Going blind is another fear of mine, since I’m already halfway there.
Add comment March 2, 2007
Rant, A how-to.
I have seen and heard of “rants” in the media, various books even magazines.
But, not one of these rants truly are rants.
In fact to truly rant, one must have years of practice.
First, let me speak of emotions. Emotions are the core of the rant, and while the subject may vary and the train of thought may continue from one to another the emotion sets the tone and stays the same. Unless of course, it too changes. But that occurs rarely and when it does so, it is barely noticable as the change is either slight, or so slow and gradual the one who listens to the ranter (the rantee, perhaps) cannot notice until the end, perhaps some time after the rant is cut off.
Note, dear Reader, that I did not say “rant is finished” in the above sentence. I did not say it merely because a rant never finishes. One gets interrupted but the thoughts never cease (unless of course you were interrupted by death) and the inner turmoil continues.
Where was I? Emotions. Yes, but first I shall allude to my previous transition. A rant goes on and on until someone checks him or herself and goes back to the topic that started it all. In this way a rant has an infinite amount of topics that starts with one thing and might as well end with thousands of others.
But we were speaking of emotions. The usual emotion is annoyance, frustration, perhaps even anger. These can sometimes be called tirades. But I have never heard a depressing rant. Usually the annoyance fades away into acceptance and the rant itself also trails of into nothingness. Acknowledgement of oneself and others can do very bad things indeed.
Let us move on to the next component of a rant.
One has to at all times, rant until they are no more, for ranting brings into the mind a great sensation of transcendence. That is all.
When one rants for so long that the starting topic has been forgotten, the purpose has been achieved. For instance when I rant about ranting and how others cannot rant, and you know how annoying it is when people just complain and then say, “oh sorry, I just like ranting” but they don’t know that there’s a big difference and they’re so annoying, not just because of that but also because they like to complain, but I like to complain, and I suppose I’m complaining now but it isn’t the same as ranting because I can rant without whining or complaining, though they might be seen to ignorant people as the same kind of thing, and speaking of which did you hear–?
The above, my dear Reader, was a true rant. See how it is all one sentence. It is truly effective however when one is able to speak multiple languages. This way one can transition from one language to the next and fade back into the first one (preferably the first one is the one spoken by your listener). This way you can end your rant with, “Isn’t that right?” and have achieved another purpose of ranting.
Purpose
The purpose of the rant is unclear to many, but there are a few wise and learned ones who do know.
Ranting is used mainly to annoy, confuse, anger or create general mayhem and or distraction.
Ranting also brings about enlightenment. Or more annoyance. Whichever.
I like to rant, and that for me, says everything.
Dear reader, I told you about ranting because I like to rant and I hope you recognize them. I also, wish you the best of luck in your own ranting ventures. And now I want to rant.
I cannot stand people who do not know how to rant so I create a guide that no one will read, but why am I doing it if I know it won’t be used as a guide at all–not like that is necessary either I just need to vent but I can do that when I rant and I think I should go now before the people with the white coats come now because they always come around now and they take me away in a van to the place and why do they have to do that all the time anyway–I just want to rant, it’s not like I’m going to attack someone in my stupor or anything or do stuff like find someone that I know and talk to them until their ears bleed and maybe that’s why they stay away from me but I think it’s just because they’re weird and those people are here now, I wonder why they’re late and they’ve got something shiny with them…
Woooooooo. Everything is wooooooooo.
Add comment February 23, 2007
What noise does a Groundhog make?
It’s groundhog day! Groundhog day! We won’t be having any more winter! Nuh-uh! Go away! Bad freezing cold weather, forcing me to turn into an icey-cube! Though I do like cubes. I like all square things. I seem to have a habit of squaring anything that’s important. I dunno why.
Speaking of Groundhog Day, why does the most technologically advanced country in the world rely on a rodent to ascertain whether or not winter shall continue?
Tex ate three marshmallows today. I’m not sure whether marshmallows should be eaten by a penguin. But then he burped and clapped it’s wings together. And I squeezed it until it’s eyes bulged out gave it a hug. I like Tex. I’m keeping him!
….Maybe I should rethink my “Goodbye Winter!” deal.
Add comment February 2, 2007
